Over the last few months, a lot has been happening to me careerwise. I started volunteering at an e-commerce start-up to gain first-hand experience working as a front-end developer. And finally, I got my first job as a junior frontend developer.
I've been so busy, trying to learn new things, looking for a job, and going through a series of interviews. It's been a month since I started working as a front-end developer,(If you know me, or have read any of my articles on medium, you know its a big deal for me), and I'm going to tell you how it has been.
For the first part of the month, I had to start learning a new frontend framework, I moved away from React which I already knew and started learning Vue.js, it was quite easy to learn because I already had a background with React. Although I wouldn't say I'm perfectly good with vue yet, I'm getting there. I also had to strengthen my knowledge in Tailwind CSS, a CSS framework, and with that, I was good to start working as a full-time frontend developer.
But there’s a problem, my tasks were coming in fast and going out slowly, and the self-doubt slowly starts creeping in. The feeling of inadequacy, and incompetence stemming from working in a new environment, with new people, that have high expectations from you.
Don't get me wrong !!!, I love where I work, and they have given me the opportunity to grow, I was provided with a new laptop, and I’ve gotten to work with amazing, and always helping people. But how does someone go from being confident and optimistic to being scared and vulnerable?.
I've come to realize that like many young adults, I was simply under the influence of what I refer to as the drug of self-doubt itself, the persistent feeling that I don't deserve to be where I currently am, fearing that I'm not as competent as others make me out to be. I begin to doubt my skills, my knowledge, and my capabilities. This feeling is called THE IMPOSTER SYNDROME.
Over the last few weeks, I've strived to work harder than usual, sleepless nights, in order to learn and work on my tasks. Imposter syndrome came with a blow, and I’m currently kicking its ass. I've talked to friends that are more experienced in software development, and what do you know, they also feel the same way 😄😄😄. And that's how I know it's not a ME thing, it's a universal thing.
From now on, I've decided to do as much as I can, learn, grow and rest when I need to, everyone has the impostor syndrome sometimes, but what makes us different is choosing to overcome it.